I grew up in a home that was remodeled many times. It was a fairly standard house, which meant that when I was growing up, the only way to fix things was to do it yourself.
This wasn’t a problem for me. I wanted to do things that were mine. I’d do anything to get away from being told that I had to do it myself. I did have my brothers help me with the kitchen. They were willing to do anything to show me how much they enjoyed doing things. This was a bit of a problem because I was pretty good at being a total douche.
But it turned out that when I was growing up I never had the ability to do things myself. I always had to be told that I could do it myself. I remember one of my teachers being very strict about this, and I remember being like, “How is that even possible?” I remember feeling like my whole childhood was a bit of a waste. I felt like I was being a bit of an odd duck. And I remember my parents being upset about this.
So as a kid I had to be told what I could and couldn’t do. I wasn’t allowed to go to the beach and I was never allowed to do anything with my friends that didn’t involve taking a shower and putting on my own clothes. Because I felt I was being weird, they were very upset with me. They didn’t understand why I couldn’t do things on my own.
My dad is quite the DIY guy. He bought me my first home and all my friends and I did it ourselves. Like most kids I used to complain that my dad never did anything with me. Then he bought me a house and we did it together. I started to resent him for not taking me to the beach and he started to resent me for being so independent. When I got my own place I felt like a bit of a failure.
I’m not sure how to answer this question. I feel like everyone does it differently.
That’s great advice. Its important to build your self-esteem. But don’t just be a little self-aware. It’s easy to forget you’re not the smartest person in the room. You’ll be surprised how many people will remember you when you’re in a bad mood or on the phone talking to your dad.
Yeah. And you’ll probably find that one person you’re trying to impress is going to get bored, and that one person you really want to impress is going to be a really nice person and go out of his way to help you.
Like many of the other advice I gave, this goes a long way toward feeling better about yourself. I’ve learned that I’m not as smart as I thought I was. I know that, and when I’m frustrated, I can’t think of what I could possibly have done differently to make my life better, I just sit back and think, “man. I wish I was that smart.” I don’t know how to make myself feel better.